Listen up, Nintendo fanboys, because do we have news for you! Do you own a Switch and have an Amazon Prime subscription? You do? Well, well, well, look at you, Mr. Moneybags.

Sure must be nice to be such a high roller that you can afford both Nintendo’s latest console and a $119 Amazon Prime yearly membership fee. But guess what, Lord Caviar? The rest of us peasants have to work for a living. We don’t get to just snap our fingers and have our manservants buy us any console that our greedy little millionaire mind can imagine.

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In fact, most of us will probably have to spend years pinching pennies to ever hope to purchase a Switch. Clearly, though, you’re already set for life. Must be pretty nice kicking back, counting your cash, and sipping on a fine vintage of Château Lafite while knowing that you have both Nintendo’s popular next-gen console and a service that offers free shipping on thousands of items.

Yeah, must be real nice.

You know, you’re kind of a bastard for rubbing your wealth in the faces of gamers everywhere like this. Honestly, if we had a bit more of a spine, we might tell you what we really think about you. But we know you would just use your team of high-powered attorneys to crush us and every other gamer who stands up to plutocrats like you. So, laugh it up with the rest of the well-to-do dukes and duchesses out there who get to enjoy both a Nintendo Switch and free Amazon shipping on all games. In fact, maybe you can order some more gold houses while you’re at it, you son of a bitch.

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